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There is just so much competition and everything has been done before a million times. I sometimes despair. We are living in a hypo-fast creative society were millions of artists are fighting tooth and claw to produce art to sell, working like slaves just to get noticed. If money and fame is the aim you are doomed and might as well give in. Even if you are the best of the best there are at least 100 other artists who are just as good as you.

I am not the best of the best, not even close, and don't have any recognition as an artist. It has to be about the creation, if it wasn't for that I wouldn't do it. It's the urge to play with an idea. Lying in bed thinking "Ooh I wonder what would happen if I mixed that paint with that surface or used some weird stencil with some weird new pen." Then the urge to try it out is like a drug.

Also I am never satisfied and just have to keep moving from one creation to the next. So i'm not like those guys who do comic books (unfortunately) they get so good at doing the stuff they do because they love it and do the same thing hour after hour day after day. I'd keep going of on tangents.

I have been watching a lot of you-tube videos were people are talking about how to draw. Seems like another scam to me. Going on and on for hours and hours. Really you could teach the basics in a few hours and write it all down in a very thin hand-book. The ART is practice and loving the practice. You can pretty much learn everything in a few days the rest is perseverance and practice.

So, so, so, so many people scamming, scamming to make money out of art without much creative soul. It's like everything at the moment, in this overpopulated maddening world, people are clamoring for jobs and positions that they probably aren't suited to, but they want the money, whilst those who probably are suited to the jobs just cannot muster the egotistical ruthless narcissism needed to succeed.

An Inspiring Incident in Thailand.

This particular spot in Thailand, where I took the photographs, holds a certain meaning to me from a few years ago. Then coincidentally on Monday I was doing a walking meditation and found myself back at that same area.

As I arrived at a certain poignant, and for me very meaningful, stage of my meditation I realized I had arrived back at this spot from a few years previous and that their standing in front of me was a magnificent statue of Buddha which I had not seen before and indeed had not been there before…
So I decided to go back there today and take some photographs of the Buddha statue – when I got there there was a Thai lady dressed in customary Thai Goddess attire ready to start a very traditional ceremonial dance in front of the Buddha. There was literally nobody else there just this Thai Lady dressed as a Goddess and I.

It was as if she was waiting for me and was ready to do a private ceremonial Buddhist dance for me. I arrived, she acknowledged me and she began the dance. It was a very beautiful dance. My photographs, which were rushed, do not do justice to the elegance of her movements – she pulled off some real yogic style moves – bending her fingers, arms and legs into obscure but refined positions. Very impressive graceful, eloquent and elegant

When she finished she bowed at me, thanked me and then left…. I stood up and went in front of the Buddha and made three very heartfelt prostrations to the statue and I must admit I was moved to tears (which I manfully and skillfully disguised as heat fatigue).
As most of my friends will know Buddhism has been a big part of my life and a spiritual guiding force since I was a young teenager.
Although I don’t say I am a Buddhist, I don’t think organized religion is a good idea, is mostly corrupt,dangerous and I actually don’t agree with most of it. I do very seriously believe in spiritual growth and spiritual healing and know through studying and practicing the Buddhist teachings, regarding taking control of one’s own mind, that they are very real and powerful.
The whole incident was very significant and symbolic on many levels to me, I have been on a 'spiritual journey' (I don’t like the term but most people relate to that phrase) for a long time and I have had many experiences:- amazing, otherworldly, terrifying, blissful, trippy, but mostly experiences overcoming childish and selfish emotions.

This little incident was like the ending of a spiritual stage of growth and the start of a new chapter – it linked up many different things and was a real “stage” or “step” were many disparate things all came together and made sense in my mind.
The look the lady Goddess dancer gave me as she left really moved me, one of those knowing meaningful looks, and I hope my little story and photographs will give you some positive energy and help you to continue to know that life is magical, worthwhile, full of meaning and spiritual. Compassion, wisdom, peace, humor and love to you all.

There is one message that I get from the masters and it’s: ‘Don’t fit in’

‘Fitting in’ is the big problem. Fitting in starts as soon as you’re born and it starts with your family. Let’s imagine your family are Christian fundamentalists, or devout Muslims, Buddhists or racists, or football supporters, or members of a cult, if this is the case, from day one, you will be brainwashed into their creed.
This ‘programming’ is what sets your brain of on the tracks of right and wrong; it’s what creates your character, identity and ego. It is this false self, a self dependent on a set of bias principles which can only ultimately provide you with a fraction of the picture. We are born with the big picture already present in our pure awareness but little by little we are shut of from it and a wall of emotional trauma and emotional prejudice is built around our Buddha nature, our pure awareness. And if you believe in past lives we will also bring all of our past life trauma, prejudice and fixed perspective with us into our new lives.

To remain in the moment, not denying thoughts and emotions, not grasping after them but simply allowing them to dissolve into the spaciousness of our awareness, if we do that, we have stopped fitting in. To do that we must let go of all of our ideas about who we are and what is good and bad. We must let go and open our pure awareness into the space of the moment. If we can do this, little bit by little bit expanding into and accepting space, we can gradually begin to see the big picture. An effortless, breathtaking growth occurs as we intuitively infuse our awareness with empty space, recognizing all things to be empty. And in that vibrant emptiness is wisdom, compassion and bliss.

Let go of your false identity, let go of the crutches that hold you together. Drop your masks, one by one until you reveal the heart of wisdom that is your true self. Maybe we wear the mask of the monk, or the football supporter, or the Christian, or the rocker, or the punk, or the nerd, or the free spirit, or the new age traveller, or the philanthropist, or the hard man, or the soldier, or the pot head, or the office worker, or the manager, or the husband, or wife, or the man, or the woman. It’s all masks, it’s all fleeting, it’s all a game. I found a blissful humour when I learned to let go of all of my masks and rest in the pure clarity of the moment, the trick, I suppose, is to keep the masks off.

Rest in natural great peace this exhausted mind,
Beaten helpless by karma and neurotic thoughts
Like the relentless fury of the pounding waves
In the infinite ocean of samsara.
Rest in natural great peace.
— Nyoshul Khen Rinpoche

“Look past your thoughts, so you may drink the pure nectar of This Moment.”
― Rumi

“There is
a time to live
and a time to die
but never to reject the moment.”
― Lao Tzu

“Meditation is the dissolution of thoughts in Eternal awareness or Pure consciousness without objectification, knowing without thinking, merging finitude in infinity.”
― Voltaire

During this summer (2016) I made about 10 really weird paintings - this is one of them .

If I stare at a texture or a pattern I can imagine all kinds of animals, people landscapes etc.

I made a few heavily textured paintings and then stared at them for hours allowing images to appear, I kept trying to paint in the visions I would see - it was really difficult to do, This is one of the results - in this one I kept seeing Birds, leaves, flowers and little elemental beings -

I will try to post the other ones soon.

The ancient Greek religion and mythology is as deep as any eastern philosophy, it contains pretty much everything that is in Hinduism, Buddhism and the Tao Te Ching. The language is mysterious and the style of preserving the sacred teachings and imparting them to others was very unique and special.

Apollo is one of the 12 most important Olympian Gods of the Greek religion. These gods function on many levels and represent many different things. They are at once real energetic forces of deity and at the same time embodiment's of laws of nature and Sacred truths.

Apollo is the sun, the literal sun and the sacred sun. Outwardly he is the actual sun in the sky and rules over the celestial realm, embodying the sacred light that brings all manifestation into being. Apollo is the sign of Leo in the Zodiac, again representing the ruling sun. He is the creative life giving aspect of Zeus. He is also the light within man, the divine spark, the sun within man, the creative force that drives us to make things and strive for new information and skills. The joy and enthusiasm one feels in ones heart whilst engaged in some creative project. Apollo is often depicted with the 9 Muses.

I was puzzled for a while to see the deeper meaning behind the muses. Why should the sun be divided into nine? Why should Apollo be followed by nine muses? It seemed to me to be creative in nature. I think maybe the muses have something to do with octaves. In a lot of Greek sculptures they are seen grouped into three. Maybe three represent a full Octave. Therefore the nine represent the progression of three full octaves

Maybe what we have in the nine muses is a symbolic representation of two important laws of nature. The law of three forces:- active, passive and neutral, and the law of octaves. All creative processes are directly influenced by the three forces, these forces manifest everywhere. The law of octaves tells us that all things created by the three forces are musically ordered.

The three muses representing the passive octave might be Urania the muse of astronomy, Clio the muse of history and Melpomene who was the muse of tragedy. The three muses representing the neutral octave might be Terpsichore the muse of dance, Euterpe who was the muse of music and Thalia the muse of comedy. The three muses representing the active and higher octave might be Polyhymnia the muse of sacred poetry, Erato who was the muse of love poetry and Calliope who was the muse of epic poetry.

Another aspect of the muses that occurred to me was the nature of each muse. Each muse represents something to do with the arts. I couldn�t figure this out for a while. I mean why isn�t there a muse for painting, drawing or sculpture? But then I realized the muses don�t represent the different art forms. They represent all of the possible subject matters that an artist can work with. All paintings, poems, stories, or sculptures will fall into one or more of the categories of subject that the 9 represent.

So Apollo, amongst other things, represents the creative force within man. The nine muses explain how this creative force works and the different areas within which it functions.

Renaissance Magic

look at Poussin, one of a hundred or so magical artists from the renaissance. This guy was painting exquisite, large scale ,hyper-real paintings before electricity was discovered, before the steam engine, hell before even gas lighting. If you look at the Pre-Raphaelites you could probably make a case for why they were the best technical painters from history, the best at depicting myth and symbolic story, but most of those guys were super privileged playboys of a modern world of invention and pioneering technology. What makes the renaissance, a Poussin or a Da Vinci absolute magic is that they come from a period of time where the majority of mankind was steeped utterly in myth and witchcraft. If you could read and write back then you were considered to be some kind of wizard. Can you imagine the affect these paintings must have had on the minds of the people at that time? This was the beginning of the enlightenment, before Baudelaire�s �Modernity. Before Mankind was fully aware of his situation in time and space. Copernicus and Galileo had just sussed out that the earth wasn�t the center of the universe and we were just becoming truly skeptically aware with Descartes� �I think therefore I am� and it would be another three hundred years before we discovered Nietzsche�s �God is dead�.

So when people saw Greek gods, ancient stories, depictions of the holy trinity, the last super and the flagellation of Christ It wasn�t a novel use of the imagination, it was real, the real representation of supernatural events that people believed 100%. This wasn�t myth and symbolism this was divine revelation on the canvas. These paintings were like magical portholes into another realm of being, they would have induced awe and reverence, even more so than they do today. Two point perspective and realistic light and shade were amazing new drawing technologies as impressive to renaissance people as virtual reality or 3d high definition TV ts to us.

Getting Back To Drawing

I have recently gone back to looking at these old masters. I have been studying the Venetian style of painting and wanted to go back and try and get my drawing skills up to scratch before attempting a painting. Especially because in the old Venetian style you basically draw the image in black and white and then layer colour on top of it, so the painting is entirely dependent on your drawing skills.

I chose a Poussin, a complex swirling flow of figures "The victory of Neptune". I made 6 or 7 small sketches to try and figure out different elements of the composition. I then made a full tonal drawing at A3 size. It was so tedious for me! I must admit I really didn't enjoy making it. The finished tonal drawing is OK, but for the amount of effort I put in it wasn't up to Renaissance standard!
To be successful at this kind of thing you have to do it full time. If I didn�t teach and could do it every day I would get better and quicker. But even if I did have all of that time I'm not sure I would want to take this route.
To check out the sketches click here: http://hidden-guru.blogspot.com/2013/09/poussin-and-reflections-on-being-artist.html

Personal Reflections on Being an Artist

I know in all honesty I am just starting to find my voice as an artist. I have been doing this since I was 15 but I still can�t say that any of my paintings are strong. To be successful maybe you need at least one of a few different things, 1) a recognizable style, 2) an interesting subject matter, 3) application skills, and 4) unique or ingenious manipulation of paint or other mediums, if you have any one of these, I believe, you can become successful. I don't mean financially successful, that�s a whole other issue. I mean satisfied and maybe recognized by other artists.